As I was showering this morning an expression of my mom’s came to me cuz I was shampooing my head. I instinctively rubbed behind my ears because my mom always said they were so dirty behind there. I could grow carrots now. I don’t know how that was supposed to happen but that’s what I remember. And so today I still think of that when I rub behind my ears. So that got me thinking about other expressions that Mom has taught me over the years and some of these expressions have real value and some of them are questionable. But in any case, they’ve all stuck with me through the years.

When Mom would walk in and see my room was a mess. She’d asked me if I was born in a barn. So now when I think the house is getting a little bit crazy. I think of that expression and I decide that no Mom I’m not a pig. I will clean up.

Staying on the farm front. Going in and out of the house all day. Would aggravate Mom. What do you think? We’re not in the country. Close that door.

All they’re saying is a mom include you better finish what’s on your plate. They’re starving children in China that would love to have that. And I can tell you from experience replying while then send it to them is not the right response. And while that may be true, might not finishing my plate was not going to feed them. And we have since learned that finishing everything on your plate, even when you’re full is not a healthy situation. But Mom grew up with the depression mentality that nothing could go to waste and I understand that and I still try to honor that. For example, if I go to a buffet I don’t pile up on a bunch of stuff that I know I’m not going to try or finish.

As I got older I noticed mom’s wisdom changed. And it was amazing how much smarter my mom got the older I got, particularly when I was raising kids of my own. I learned that no I was not made of money and we needed to turn the air conditioner up and not be an ice box.

But then there was Faith wisdom. I was struggling with some issues at a church and my mom reminded me not confused the people of the church with my faith in Christ. And that is helped me through many different church situations where it’s easy to confuse the motives of man with the motives of God.

Then there was the time she said something just out of conversation that is stuck with me all these years. And good friend of hers was struggling. This friend’s husband had passed away and the lady was struggling emotionally. Spiritually physically. And Mom did her best to be there for her and I know the lady was grateful. But Mom said I don’t know how she’s getting through. She doesn’t have any faith in God and I don’t know how you get through this life without being able to turn and trust God. Looking back, I know through many many rough spots in my life I have turned my focus to Christ. I have put my faith and hope in Jesus.

There were other expressions that Mom talked about and wisdom that she gave without realizing she was giving wisdom. One was saved for retirement. I wish I’d started sooner. Another was to save from every paycheck and to wait to purchase something until you could pay for it in full.

Mom also taught me the value of family and the value of having family around you and yet remaining independent. Mom would have told you those last 2 years. She would have struggled without all the family helping her out. Yet she lived on her own in her own place until she died. I take comfort in that I think comfort in the fact that Mom lived her life the way she wanted to. She traveled. She engaged with other people. She was willing to change. After living in the Wisconsin dells for 25 years and the last number of years by herself, she realized she was getting a little stir crazy. A little cabin fever and she agreed to move closer to family in Chicago and so for the last number of years she was attending birthday parties Christmas and Thanksgiving gatherings.

Again, not all of mom’s wisdom was true. Some of it was just expressions to remind me to do something such as washing behind my ears but some of it still influences my life today.

Living on the reservation and watching people grow up without supportive parents. I wonder where there wisdom comes from. I know some of them overcome poor childhoods and they move on to become excellent mothers themselves. But it reminds me of how much we are all shaped by our family. Whether blood or friendship has we grow up and learn valuable lessons. One of the examples I use with groups is who here thinks they’re a good cook. And then I asked the follow-up question taught you how to cook? Almost always the answer is Mom or my grandma or other relatives. We need that to help us grow. And I will tell you my mom was not a great cook but I never went hungry. But she is the one who gave me my love of baking and making other food to share.

So my question to you, what words of wisdom do you still remember from growing up? What phrase that you heard often when you were little? Do you still remember today?

I am grateful that God gave me a supportive family, a mom and a stepfather who cared enough to spend time with me and teach me lessons. I know that God loves me. I know that God loves you and so do I.